I was looking back on my journey entries when I was at a 3-day Goddess retreat in 2017, and I came across the Groups Commitment Declaration. At the time, I didn't realise on a conscious level how profound the message was, but, subconsciously, my soul was emerging, and my inner child was ready to stand tall. That’s when I realised where I’ve been and who I’m becoming.
I am not my past nor my future but I am present and today is the day I give myself permission to remove the old conditioned blockages from my mind, body and soul in exchange for health, freedom and love within all aspects of my life. Today is the day that I start taking full responsibility for my own beliefs and awareness I am now willing to surrender to opening up the possibility that healing is within me, that deep healing is mine on every level, layer, plane and dimension. I trust in my own intuition and I call upon the wisdom of my heart to guide me through the next 3 days as I reach new, deeper levels of insight and understanding regarding my conditioning and the way that this continues to manifest in my daily life. I am willing and open to slowing down to listen to the signs and symptoms, the language of body and take guided action accordingly. I am prepared to release that which no longer serves me in exchange for freedom, peace and joy. I am willing and open to connecting with the deepest part of who I am, my spirit and listen to the yearning of my inner truth and inspiration. I will hold myself accountable, knowing that the only thing that will get in my way of my progress will be me. I am prepared to break through the resistance when it presents itself in various forms and reflections. I am willing and open to the layers, through the levels, planes and dimensions in my body, mind and soul to see what miracles life has in store to see. Once I uncover this deep awareness, I promise to celebrate who I am in every aspect by showing myself self-love and respect revealing my inner light to everyone around me. I am now prepared to search through the darkness to bring myself back into the light.
Signed, Lisa Pavlic.
Finding this signed declaration gave me an overwhelming feeling of freedom and confirmed the reasoning behind this book. I now know that it’s time to unleash my inner child; she has been locked up so tightly for years, and I was scared to let her out, but it is now time to release her. Our inner child holds the key to unlocking doors that appear in front of us, but they take great strength and courage to reach. You need to understand why you locked them up in the first place, which in itself can be a challenging puzzle to solve.
It’s time to start searching deeper within and bring my inner child back for good. Once I had decided this, I brought myself to a place of comfort and allowed myself to reach back in time to find my inner child. I remember seeing her at the age of 5, riding her bike around in circles, laughing and playing. When I returned to myself, I saw her sitting on the step-in front of me, looking lost and confused with her hands over her cheeks. I sat and pondered on that image for a while because I really didn’t know how to resolve it yet.
I constantly had signs all around me; whether it was through music, numbers or conversations, there were signs, loud and clear. But one thing dominated: the song “When Doves Cry”. However, I didn't really see the signs for what they were. I thought I needed to search deeper to really understand the meaning of it all, but what I discovered was a sensitive child of the light; my heart chakra was open as far as the horizon. To be able to still function in the world around me, I learnt how to close a piece of my heart; that piece was connected directly to my inner child. In time, I learnt how to keep her locked away so I couldn’t feel all the energy vibrations that surrounded me.
I was so sensitive, and my feelings were so overwhelming that it was too much for me to endure during that time. I couldn’t function ‘normally’ in the era I was born. To be able to fit in, I needed to pay a price. I now know that “When Doves Cry” was a direct message to me from my inner child. The vision of my inner child lost and confused was her calling out to me: “How could you do this to me? I don’t know what I did wrong”.
The next day, I had a dinner date with one of my soul sisters. I love our catch-ups, and although our time together is short and we have much distance between us, we always have deep encouraging messages for each other. I know I can be completely myself with her, and she knows she can be herself with me. This allowed me to search deeper within.
We started to talk about our inner children, and everything paused around me. I remember sitting there, listening to my beautiful friend talk about her inner child with so much unconditional love. I always knew this was one of her greatest strengths but as she was speaking, tears formed in my eyes. She then asked me, “How do you feel about your inner child, Lis, when you think of her?” I paused for a moment, then replied, “I don’t feel the unconditional love that you feel for yours” I said, with a tear coming down my face. It wasn’t until I finally allowed myself to say those words out loud that it hit me like a tonne of bricks. Wow. I hadn’t realised it was as bad as this. I had a lot of healing to do on the inside, and there was still a long road ahead.
In time, I learnt how to bring my inner child out in everyday encounters to learn how to connect with her again. Initially, I did this through meditation and just sitting in her space. In time, I could feel her energy and presence in my day-to-day life. I was rebuilding my connection to my inner child so I could finally have my whole self together again. My overall contentment towards myself started to stream back into my energy fields. My energy level, which was sustaining my sense of belonging, became prominent.
For me, reconnecting with my inner child was vital and what I needed to achieve to continue on this path of abundance. I still know that it’s not going to be easy, but now I have this newfound understanding of what I have been missing, which will keep me striving in the right direction. I know that I have locked-up my inner child for decades, and there is still a process of rediscovery that needs to take place. I now know that she is worth fighting for as she is a missing piece of my soul. I will continue to strive forward with my whole self, not leaving any piece of myself behind.